Why Buy the Cow....?

In an attempt to illustrate my mother’s high moral view, she would say Why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free?   I used to think why do people judge the cow? The farmer is the one pimping her out. He is the idiot not making the profit—not the cow. She has no vested interest whatsoever in who drinks her milk. But for many years out of respect for my mother I simply listened and said nothing.

But not too long ago when my mother gave me the milk for free speech I responded with Who buys a pair of shoes without trying them on first? And she got a little angry despite my witticism and said that’s not the same thing.

But the truth of the matter is that it is. We no longer live in an age where purity is expected. In fact, the idea of premarital purity is a vestigial appendage of the past—like the wisdom teeth of the moral code. And while some people retain their wisdom teeth with no ills; most people, because it is more prudent to do so, have them yanked before they cause problems. Keeping those wisdom teeth is a gamble.

We live in an age where couples marry later in life and understand that wearing a “shoe” that fits, is comfortable, and will wear well over time is an integral part of a lasting relationship. And there is nothing like a great pair of shoes—go ask Cinderella and her prince for verification.

On a Hallmark card I once read: Why buy the pig when all you want is a piece of sausage? I agree. Especially when it comes to chorizo.