Choosing Between Apples and Apples

When Briana was deciding which college to choose it boiled down to Bucknell or Richmond. Each school provided the academic program she was looking for---business and dance. And the profile of the student body was also the same. The experience in the classroom and out was undetectably different. So the decision was difficult. It was choosing between apples and apples—Macintosh versus Cortland—discerning between the mildest variation in taste and texture.

After my back to back weddings, the question that inevitable came up was how did the two weddings compare with each other? Because even though each was a separate event, there is a natural tendency to do side by side accounting. People wanted to know which wedding was the winner.

My nephew’s wedding was wonderful. The priest who performed the mass and ceremony was warm and his homily was heartfelt and wise. One could feel the enthusiasm and love of the bride and groom—it permeated the entire day. And all the extraneous things: the fashion, the flowers, the venue and the food were elegant-- yet not overly opulent. The setting was relaxed and somewhat bucolic. Everyone who attended truly wanted to be there—it was not an obligation to be fulfilled. Everyone enjoyed themselves. I loved it. I thought it was perfect.

The second wedding—the client wedding-- in contrast was very different. It was held at the Steiner Studios in Brooklyn. The bride and groom were slightly older—both lawyers who met on the first day of their college orientation. The bride was Jewish and the groom was what my Aunt Jackie would call alta-Italian—high class Italian Catholics. The ceremony was nondenominational. The bride and groom wrote their own vows which evoked both laughter and tears. It was beautiful—candlelit and the New York skyline at sunset. It was very urban and opulent. And even though I was there out of obligation and not desire, I loved it. I thought it was perfect.

Because Bucknell and Richmond were so barely dissimilar in all the important comparative things, Briana made her decision based on a very significant yet seemingly insignificant thing: her hair. In Virginia her hair would likely frizz up on a routine basis where as in central Pennsylvania, where the humidity was less of a climatic factor, her hair would remain straight and smooth. Hair was the determining factor---it was a quality of life issue.

And I suppose if my hand is forced to choose between each perfect wedding of course I must choose my nephew’s---not because I love him and he is family-- but because at his cocktail hour they served mini hotdogs. And they were delicious. I ate several. Because it just isn’t a party without the mini hotdogs---or at least that is what Briana says.